Listening As Spiritual Hospitality

I write this month’s Pastor’s Corner while serving as a volunteer at the Emergency Warming Response center hosted in Immanuel’s fellowship hall. Tonight’s guest count is three, all from Wright City and Warrenton areas. Our homeless live in their vehicles in plain sight. Their stories are terribly complicated.  

Volunteers pull up chairs with and lay out cots with fresh linens. Get-to-know-you conversations strike up with highs and lows, and always a fun-loving dose of exaggeration that makes for an incredulous story. Hot plates of dinner are served up with bottles of cool water and cups of hot coffee. Phones are plugged in for recharge and screens with photos of joys and loves are shared. Listening is tonight’s important work now that basic needs are met. 

While listening as new friends share, I was reminded of something that Jesuit Priest Henri Nouwen wrote in his book, Bread for the Journey: A Daybook of Wisdom and Faith. 

“Listening is much more than allowing another to talk while waiting for a chance to respond. Listening is paying full attention to others and welcoming them into our very beings. The beauty of listening is that, those who are listened to start feeling accepted, start taking their words more seriously and discovering their own true selves. Listening is a form of spiritual hospitality by which you invite strangers to become friends, to get to know their inner selves more fully, and even to dare to be silent with you.” 

Nouwen’s words about listening as a form of spiritual hospitality resonates within me. I thought about how often I chose to talk rather than asking curious questions with a listening ear, learning from what I receive. I would always learn too late that I missed out when the moment was long gone.

Active listening is a beautiful art and skill. Some seem to be natural born listeners while others of us learned through practice over time. Listening is a precious gift to fragile neighbors who feel invisible because they are rarely asked curious questions from a heart of hospitality. We think we know what they need. But do we, really? Have we asked them to share about themselves? We do more than learn, we understand by listening to the source. Learning names. Asking thought provoking questions. Hearing stories of joy and hardship. Likes and dislikes.

I recently heard an overnight guest comment to a volunteer, “You make us feel like humans.” This is an important word. Simple listening restores the soul of humanity. This is important for us to hear.

...and the only way to hear these words is offering the hospitable spiritual gift of a listening ear.